Dating Tips & Advice - Your Questions Answered

If you are considering using online dating websites for the first time consider some of the following obstacles before signing up.

Online dating services are one of the internet's most commonly used services with more than twenty million singles logging on every month worldwide. Although there are many single fish in the sea, snagging the best fish takes work and requires savvy online daters to be on their game.

The following are some tips on how to stay on top of your game in the online singles world.

When you have spotted someone's profile that takes your fancy, don't get too anxious too quickly and fire off an email without giving your approach some thought. Statistics show that only 8% of initial emails will receive a reply. If online daters did some quick research into the intented recipients profile this figure could be significantly increased.

Before you make contact with another member ensure their profile has been active within the last two weeks. Better still, you will have a much better chance of receiving a response if their status is "member online now". This advice is crucial in your success as many profiles may be visible but are no longer active. Blindly sending emails and receiving little or no responses will start to chip away at your confidence, so for best results target active members.

Many online daters make the mistake of identifying multiple members they are attracted to and copying and pasting the same message to all of them. This is a very impersonal way of making contact and usually wont work. Genuine singles will respond to emails that are personal which ask specific questions regarding their profile and lets them know you actually took the time to read through their profile details.

Be positive in your approach. Say something upbeat or funny and steer clear of telling them your lonely, depressed and don't make judgmental comments. In any form of the online or offline world, people are drawn to positive and cheerful people.

Online dating singles are renowned for being untruthful in their profiles. Don't make this mistake. Be proud of who your are and decide on your best qualities. Focus on these qualities, make them your selling point until you find someone online that is searching for what you can offer them.

 

 

>> WEBCAM CHAT & THE SIGNIFICANCE IT PLAYS IN THE WORLD OF ONLINE DATING by Matt Fuller

The wide world web has been available to our homes and businesses since 1995. Prior to this, communication via computers was mostly limited to within a particular address. For example between several people working with the same building but in different offices.

While the www has only been widely available for as little as just over 10 years, can you imagine what life would be like without the internet. How did we ever make do before this very convenient tool came into our lives.

Chat rooms provide the ability to chat in real time to anyone, anywhere and at anytime. For those that have not had alot to do with chat room technology, chat room technology began with ( what's commonly known as and still used ) forums, blogs or bulletin boards. This allows people to post comments, questions and replies that can be viewed via the web. The conversation takes place via messages posted but cannot be responded to in real time. Its just like writing someone a letter and waiting for a response via the post.

Forums are still very common for like minded groups of people who comment on each others opinions. Forums are very handy for individuals wishing to gain knowledge that are inexperienced in a certain topic or skill. For example, many software companies will host a forum for their customers rather than set up a help desk. This way all their customers can bounce ideas and questions off each other. It saves the software company the hassle of having to support their customers.

Chat rooms are now by far more popular and more convenient for busy singles or business people. online dating sites and adult dating sites often host chat rooms. There are many different types of functionality available regarding chat rooms. There are general chat rooms where by multiple people can chat to each other in full view of the other chatters. There are private chat rooms where by chatters can chat privately. For a more personal chat experience there are many online dating sites that offer their members webcam chat rooms so they can see exactly what they are getting themselves into.

Webcam chat is a visual chat facility and leaves nothing to the imagination. If you plan to utilize a singles chat room a handy tip would be to search the net for free chat rooms and free adult chat rooms.

The online dating website industry offers singles many free dating sites and as chat rooms are often part of their features so you will have access to free chat rooms.

Chat rooms are a popular and convenient tool for business people giving them the choice to host meetings, job interviews or overseas conferences from within their office.

All this fascinating technology has come about in as little as around 15 years, chat room technology is again entering a new phase with the integration of mobile phones.

 

 

>> Do Free Dating Sites Pay? - Singles Dating and Chat Tips  by Matt Fuller

Why is it that singles pay for online dating services and chat rooms when there are 100% free dating sites available?

Free online dating services and chat rooms.

One of the first and easily the most successful free online dating websites ever established is plentyoffish.com The owner Markus Frind is an entrepreneur from Canada. His free online dating site boasts one of the biggest in the world with around 8 million members and 45 million visitors per month. Marcus has mainly run his free online dating service from his house on his own up until now. This will soon change with around 25 employees set to begin. Marcus is currently the largest ever single Adsense earner making an incredible 10k per day. But like any great idea, this concept has been duplicated many times and the free online chat dating industry now has just as many competitors as the paid industry. 

If you have ever wondered how they can give their services away and still make a dollar, its pretty simple. These webmasters make their money from advertising. So when more members join up the greater the potential there is for them to make money.

Singles who are looking around to choose which free dating website catches their attention will notice that many of the free online dating services have all the up to date features that the paid sites have - You have ever stopped to think why singles keep paying for dating sites? Some free dating sites provide Instant messenger, web cam chat, video feature, private chat rooms and general chat rooms. In fact you would be pushed to find a paid dating and chat service that can offer better features than many free sites offer.

These days when you hear something is free normally there is a catch involved. No, they are just that,free no catch, just register, join, browse/meet and chat to singles all for free. Whilst alot of the free online dating websites have state of the art features, and the webmasters who create them think its a good idea at the time, there is a big over supply of free online dating services so most have a small data base. Sure its fantastic something is free but without many singles to choose from its really no help. The search engines have pages and pages of paid and free dating services but only a small number of them are successful. The race to reach the top of the search engines sees many free dating site owners fighting a losing battle.

There are certainly some great free dating and chat sites out there that do in fact have decent numbers in terms of their data base so spend an hour or two searching them out to locate one that stacks up.

Paid online dating services.

The big question is why do paid dating sites continue to see growth when there are free dating services hungry for your membership?

The free online dating method has not been around for as long as the paid method. As with many competitive industries the most successful players - like Marcus from plentyoffish have the talent to come up with new ideas to divert away from the main stream market. It boils down to first in best dressed.

The more established dating websites who were one of the first in the race seems to be where most singles eventually end up heading for, paid or free is basically irrelevant. The established dating services have massive member numbers. Many singles are searching the free dating sites and are usually disappointed with the lack of members and end up paying a subscription on one of the more well known dating sites. Subscription methods vary. Some dating sites sell monthly subscriptions and the average is around $25.00 a month. Others sell their memberships on a stamp or credit method where by you are charged each time you initiate contact with another member. The monthly payment concept works out alot cheaper so if you have no joy finding a decent free online dating site search for an established paid dating site that offers a competitive monthly rate.

Look around and you will soon find what your looking for.

 

 

>> ONLINE DATING DILEMMAS  by Matt Fuller

Are you embarrassed to have turned to the internet for love? What will you do if you end up meeting someone online and they become part of your life? Will you lie to your friends about how you met?

The stigma of online dating has certainly stuck since its rise onto the singles scene about ten years ago. Generally, trends, views and peoples perceptions change with just about anything as new generations view these trends as the norm. However the "desperate" tag of online dating and singles chat rooms seems to have remained in tact despite the change of generations and online dating becoming increasingly (secretly) popular.

Online dating, for most singles is conducted with a degree of anonymity, at least at the start until you feel comfortable discussing your experiences with your friends regarding some of the singles you have dated. Lets face it, I'm sure it would make for some pretty interesting conversations. Common stories published online about online dating dilemmas include profile photos looking nothing like the real person, mobile phones ringing and being answered during the date or just bad manners in general.

In spite of the fact that online dating has become a socially standard means of dating for singles , most people are still some what slightly embarrassed to admit they've turned to a singles site for love. They fact is that many of us do it and it continues to gain popularity, however there still remains a strong element of awkwardness discussing the matter publicly.

Dating online in your local area also presents a potential problem in that you are bound to run into other singles you have dated online. If your trying to keep your dating membership a secret among your friends, you may find yourself in a spot of bother if one of your previous online dates spots you at the local pub with your mates and comes over for a chat and happens to mention to your friends how the two of you met. Try explaining your way out of that one!

Many of us know someone or have heard stories of online dates going horribly wrong. A singles profile gives off a certain impression, however meeting someone in a real life scenario rarely compares to their online dating profile. Did you know that singles who date online regularly will date eight different singles (on average) before they meet someone they click with. With those figures its easy to see why many singles stop using online dating sites and give up out of frustration caused by bad dates.

 

 

>> 30 is the new 20 for modern dating and singles  by Matt Fuller

Thirty year olds are following the same life trends twenty year olds followed in previous times.

Roughly ten or twenty years ago, if we hadn't started a family and were not married by our late twenties or early thirties it was considered out of the ordinary. Parents would start to wonder whether their children had missed the boat and had all but lost the opportunity to settle down and have a family.

Twenty years ago, the most common age to marry was 22. The average age nowadays is 29. Factors such as a rising cost of living, more social options and a general acceptance from society to remain available and single for longer has created the option for today's singles to stay single. In recent times 30 something's are adopting the same trends as 20 something's.

Much of the 30 + age group is remaining at home with their folks. 10 years ago this would have stirred gossip among ones peers and would have been considered alittle odd. In the old days you were virtually booted out of home immediately after leaving school. Today's singles are pursuing their uni degrees and not leaving home to sure up their financial security before moving out. Additional after school studies are seeing more and more singles in their late 20s - early 30s staying under the wing of their parents.

This recent pattern has also effected the romance and sex lives of today's singles in that they are still dating as often however they are looking at ways to meet new people that fit in with their new and increasingly common living arrangements. Singles travel is becoming more and more popular as is the internet and online dating services. Social networking has taken this next generation by storm and many see this as their only social outlet. The internet and online dating sites offer privacy that living at home with our Mum and Dad doesn't

Many singles are delaying committing to financial decisions and are pursuing their education which can lead to a small income throughout their study years. A small income can sometimes restrict our social potential. The internet and online dating offers cheap dating options and some online dating sites offer free dating for their members. The chance for internet users to expand their social options online with little or even no expense sees many aged in their late 20s or early 30s with small incomes taking up this option.

A high number of 30 year olds believe that life starts in their 30s. We have published some interesting comments by some 30 + year olds which can give some of us food for thought.

"I hit the big 3 0 last week. If you've just made it to the big 3 0 recently then I'm sure you can relate. I've heard recently and often that 30 is the new 20, but I'm sure I didn't worry when I turned 20, so why should turning 30 change the way I think? It is my opinion that age is all in your head. Actually, its just an arbitrary time. We are actually measuring the number of times we rotate around the sun... and that's the bottom line. I am mostly happy of what I've done with my 30 years here on earth. I always try to lead a satisfying life, I try and stay in good health and I adore my partner and daughter... what else matters? See you again in 2009! (when I'll turn 30 once again) "

There wont be too many who don't agree that life in today's day and age is harder than say 30 - 40 years ago. There are far more daily pressures. There is much to be said about the simple life and being content with the free things our earth offers.

 

 

>> What do women chat about? - Singles and dating advice  by Matt Fuller

What does your women chat about with her friends when your not there?

We sometimes wonder just what it is our girlfriends chat about to their friends when we are not there. Sometimes it would be great to be a fly on the wall. Are our partners truthful with us when we enquire to them what it is that they chat to their friends about?

Does she share some of your dirty laundry with her girlfriends or divulge private information you and your lover share. Is there something particular you entrust to your partner that is very private only to feel paranoid when mixing with her friends and worried that she has possibly revealed your personal details.

Does your lady chat about your sex life and all the gory details. Perhaps you have a private sexual issue you only share with your partner, but you suspect she chats about this to her girlfriends.

Females are more inclined to chat to their friends regarding personal issues than males are. We have revealed several popular topics women chat about and have shared actual feed back from nearly 200 females.

Surveys targeting 18-35 year old women through Australia's leading online dating site revealed some of the things female singles and females in relationships chat about when they meet up.

>> Fashion.

Many of these women were swept up with the latest clothing trends. Upmarket and eye catching girl wear was the subject most talked about when females met up for their regular chat sessions. Looking and feeling great in clothes was a priority. Womens glossy mags are a big influence with women and the latest clothing styles.

>> Diet.

Females liked to catch up with their friends to also discuss food, a healthy eating plan and exercise. The look good feel good method seems to be alive and well with alot of females adopting healthy habits using diet and exercise as part of their routines. Health and well being was an important factor that women chat about.

>> Love.

Love and romance was another popular topic. With all the chat nowdays about being in the singles and dating arena vs being in a committed partnership its hard to know what many females of this day and age are truly looking for. The Australian online dating site used to carry out this research claims that women generally prefer a secure environment with a loving relationship and often raise the issue with their friends of the difficulty catching the right man.

>> Sex.

Females chat to each other about their sex lives alot. Instead of going into details about certain sex acts (unlike their male counterparts) females chat about this subject on a more mental or sensitive level. Women chat about whether they are doing it or whether they arent, and with the person they are doing it with, sometimes they chat about how long it has been since they last had sex, or which man they fancied. Their boyfriends sexual performance or level of satisfaction was also a popular chat topic.

Certain free online dating and singles chat "rooms" offer free chat groups set up for females and males where they can chat about topics relating to their own gender and exchange or share experiences. Go online and search under free online dating and chat "rooms" to find out more

 

 

>> HOW TO CREATE AN ONLINE DATING SITE PROFILE THAT DRAWS ATTENTION  by Matt Fuller

Produce an Online Dating Site Profile heading that draws Attention --

Don't blend in with the online dating crowd, singles can succeed with dating sites but you need a game plan!

Many online dating websites ask that you supply a direct header message (opening line) that shows up below your username as people do searches. A lot of people do not know what to set up here and finish with generic headings like, "I might be the one for you" or "hi".

It is critical that you apply this space to produce a profile heading subject matter that compels attention - something ingenious, amusing, or unemotional that will cause an individual to want to click on your profile and study it.

There are numerous factors that go into producing a profile that people will desire to click to study. One is your photograph, another comprises your username, and then there's your heading. Here are four precise hints for producing an expert profile heading:

 

> ONE:  Avert dull and Overused headings...  When an individual can't decide on what to articulate for their heading content, they normally fall back to basic and overused headings suchlike "I might be the one" or "searching to contact new people."

You do not need to appear average. There are tens of 1000s of singles vying with you in a pursuit to find that "flawless" partner. Hence make certain that the heading you use will appeal the attention of other singles. Which one of these four online dating profile headings would draw in your attention?

"Hi" "You might be the One I'm searching" "Searching to Meet hot People" "I'm Willing to Lie About How We Got Together!"

Three from those are overused. One adopts an amusing approach to the concept of saying to others how you got together. It's unusual and smart. Make certain your heading is rare in a sea of commonness.

 

> TWO  Examine different Profile headings...  One of the better ways to create a successful dating profile heading is to examine headings other people use that matter to you. What is it about the heading that causes you to want to click on their profile and discover more? Here are some of our favourites (a few funny, a few philosophical, and some plainly intelligent):

"We create a magic couple: I've have the brains and you have got the body!" "Alright, I'm here. Now what's your additional two wishes?" "Bright spark searching to ignite common paths" "Precisely like a new job, I provide excellent benefits." "Strangers are acquaintances waiting to be established."

Apply the perceptivity you gain from studying interesting profile headings to produce your own.

 

> THREE   Apply Your heading as a Filter...  One of the greatest complaints we discover from online dating members is the amount of singles who contact them that are not what they're searching for .It possibly could be a man 15 years their senior or somebody who's physical structure type does not equate what you want. Whenever you want to improve the pursuit shown to you by eligible responders, then commence by using your heading to filter out unwanteds. For instance:

"Seeking fit 24-30 year old male single inside 20 miles of City of the Angels"

By producing a filter, when an individual who does not fit your criteria discovers your heading they are probably likely to carry on on. However when a "fit 24-30 year old local male" studies the heading, it draws him because he fulfills your criteria. Here are some genuine filter type content headings we've seen singles use on online dating sites:

"Must be at minimum 5'10" to advance on this ride" "Please be localised, healthy, over 40, and have a REAL picture." "Loving men appear to be nonexistent. If you're extinct, contact me at once." "I love an adult male in uniform. Military gentlemen, apply within."

Better your matches by applying your subject heading to filter your outcomes!

 

> FOUR   Alter Your Header subject matter...  It is always a sound idea to keep your profile refreshing by rotating your pictures and altering your header subject matter once in awhile. Every week produce a new and clever, imaginative, or filtered content heading. Contrasting subject headers appeal to different people, consequently you may reach "new" singles by keeping your header new and updated.

To succeed with online dating you need to stop and think about it. Like anything in life that is popular, online dating sites are full of competitors just as eager as you are to find the "one" Successful members using online dating sites use a strategy to succeed! What will your individual online dating strategy be that could change your life forever?

About the Author:  Matt Fuller says, "An article for internet dating newbies and how to make online dating work for you."  All the latest in singles and online dating news and articles -- Online Dating Articles - Flirting - Website - Free Online Dating Site and Chat Rooms for Singles Australia Internet Dating 

 

 

 

 

 

>>> FEATURED ARTICLE:

"The Value of Chemistry"  By WiseWoman

Main Entry: chem·is·try
Pronunciation: 'ke-m&-strE
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural -tries
Date: 1646
1 : a strong mutual attraction, attachment, or sympathy (they have a
special chemistry).

Are you questioning the validity of chemistry and it's value to your next potential relationship? Do you believe that you cannot have a successful long term, physical/sexual/emotional relationship with a person with whom you have NO chemistry?

Well a lot of us are asking these questions, and we want to know what it is about this dynamic that is so incredibly powerful and important to our achieving what we wish to achieve, with our personal ads that might attract the love of our life!

As we all know, you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you finally find your prince(ss) especially with online dating as your ticket to the vast and never ending supply of opportunities. Online dating makes this abundantly clear, as we pick through the personal ads, trying our best to weed out what options are available to us from this venue.

But one of the things that make many successful in their abilities to reach out and grab someone to actually take the action to respond, is chemistry. While you might feel a strong synergy while reading the words the person has written, the bottom line to knowing if you are romantically cohesive all boils down to meeting face to face, and experiencing the energetic attraction you have or not.

We usually know within seconds of meeting someone, if we are romantically and/or sexually attracted. Personally, I can't be romantically involved with someone with whom my energy is not in sync The initial person-to-person contact is what generates this chemistry (no matter what has transpired beforehand) and is what propels us to or repels us from wanting to share more time with this person, to see if
we might have what it takes to progress into some sort of romance.

It doesn't seem to matter that they meet all the criteria we set out to find, if we don't have that magical connection. How many times have you heard, "We just don't have any chemistry." Often, it only works one way, where the man is attracted but the woman is not or vice versa. What is it about chemistry that is so illusive? And, we all know, it has nothing whatsoever to do with good looks, material well-being, or many of the other things that we state in our ads that are minimum requirements to attract Mr. or Ms. Right!

We each have a certain "look" that we are naturally attracted to; certain race(s), age group(s), body size(s) or hair color(s). Many times if the person does not fall within these perimeters, it simply doesn't matter how wonderful they are, how rich they are, how talented they are, or what size appendages they have. If they don't pass the acid test of chemical attraction, they are rejected altogether.

And there are so many other factors involved that could make or break the deal. What if he wears an aftershave or cologne that reminds you of someone in the past that you were hurt by, or what if she has an obnoxious laugh that embarrasses you, or what if they have a nervous twitch or looks at every backside that meanders by? All of these things can be a factor, when we determine our basic attraction. There is no one thing that we can pinpoint when we have made our determination.

But for me, going with my initial gut instinct is usually the winning result.

So what do you do if you find a person who, for all intents and purposes, matches all of your criteria, but you don't feel the chemistry with? Well, I don't think there is anything you can do except move on to the next. If you don't find someone who triggers that brain chemical in you that makes you feel "special" when you
think of them, or are with them, what is the point?

I think that, in the long run, your initial instincts about this person not being a match, was the best gift the universe could give you. So if someone has rejected you because of lack of chemistry, thank the gods for this, because it's a clue that they weren't meant for you!

Too many times we create in our minds, a scenario of perfection before we even meet face to face. Chatting online, perhaps on the phone, or seeing them on a web cam helps to bring things into perspective but as I have mentioned in my other articles, this "nebulous zone" as I have called it, gets us into serious trouble, not to mention the pain caused to the other person when after meeting, there is no chemistry, and
we have to back peddle, lie or otherwise get out of what we thought was going to be a torrid romance.

We must offer a disclaimer saying that our meeting in person is to be the determining factor, so that we offer an "out," in case the chemistry just isn't conducive.

The flip side of this chemistry thing is also an enigma to me. Just because you find someone with chemistry, does not mean that you two can live out a long-term relationship in harmony and bliss! Those people on the personal ads sites who have experienced one or more failed relationships, and are hopefully seeking their last
hurrah, are well aware of this "chemistry" dynamic.

You know that for sure and for certain you had wonderful chemistry with each and
every person you have given your heart to in the past, but now you might be wondering how important having chemistry actually is. How long into the relationship does the chemistry factor remain criteria for maintaining the romance?

I offer a solution to this query. I think chemistry is indeed a gauge for our psyches to give us the signal we need, in our hearts, to go forward with this person if all the other criteria comes close to being met, as we need it to do. I don't think that we can have a heart-connected romance with a person with whom we have no chemistry. I don't think we can allow ourselves to get emotionally involved with someone who is not energetically symbiotic. Whereas we can engage in non-emotional physical sexual relationships without chemistry involved, I think emotional sex requires chemistry.

I further suggest that, once we have made the choice to love the person, we can
embellish this. The brain produces chemicals, which have a lot of clinical names, but mean that we "feel" a certain way when something happens to us. When you are attuned to another person's energy chemically, your brain emits a chemical like serotonin, which boosts your feeling of well being. When you find someone who can
produce this feeling in you, you positively glow with joy.

If you can see chemistry as a gauge to help you determine whether to give your heart, and then maintain awareness of it as you gasp in delight when you think about your chosen one, realizing that it brings a smile to your face, and a stirring in your groin, you will appreciate the power and necessity of chemistry as being a very valuable dynamic to determining and maintaining the success of your romantic well being.

How to tell if he is ready for a real loving relationship 

 

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