“It’s my first date with a stunning girl I met online. I just don’t want this one to be an awkward first date. Any ideas?”
The boring, old first date ideas for guys that have been the norm for the past 50 years just don’t cut it in the 21st century.
Going out to dinner and catching a movie may have worked back in your parents’ day, but in the murky jungle that is the modern dating scene, these classic dates aren’t going to fly.
Today, a successful first date means dropping the interview style conversation and awkward at-the-door kiss for a more exciting approach. You have to pick a stimulating environment that brings her into your world and creates a fun vibe.
Here are five first date tips that every modern man needs to know.
Be Prepared and Have Back-Up Plans
Before you even step out the door, there are a few things you need to keep in check to have a successful first date.
What to wear. Your image plays a big role so dress casual, but a bit classier, depending on the type of date. For example, you don’t want to go over board and wear a full on suit to a comedy club, but jeans, a black V-neck and a blazer is a great combo that shows you have style.
Logistically, you want to have everything in place so bring extra cash just in case for cabs or drinks. And always carry breath mints or gum with you. Always.
If the venue is overbooked or boring, make sure you have a back-up plan. An even better option is to have a few places already in mind that you want to hit during a date. Going to multiple locations in one night will make her feel like she’s been on a bunch of dates with you and will speed up the rapport process.
If you do take her home, make sure your place is cleaned up. No girl wants to walk into an apartment that looks like a dirty frat house (unless of course she’s from a sorority girl.
Ditch the Dinner and a Movie Date
Dinner and a movie is a great romantic date – when you’re married. But for a first date, it’s not conducive for you and her to get to know each other.
Rather than silently sitting in a theater, there are literally hundreds of other options you can choose that will bring her into your world and create an exciting, fun vibe.
And unlike a table at a fancy restaurant, first dates don’t have to be expensive either. In fact, no first date should cost more than around $20, which is roughly the price of two drinks.
Here are a few options I like to use when I take a woman out for the first time.
This is a great first date for two reasons: it gets the two of you up and moving plus, THERE’S A BAR!
Bowling or any sports type date allows the two of you to get competitive, creating opportunities to tease and joke with her. If you’re winning, you can jokingly rub it in or you can even make a playful bet with her (a great opportunity to amp up the sexual tension).
Comedy Club and Drinks
Seeing a stand-up comedy show is a great way to set a fun mood for the night. With the laughter already flowing, all the awkwardness usually associated with a first date disappears.
Afterwards, you can go to a dive bar or a cheap restaurant for drinks, using call-back humor from the show to make a connection during your conversation as well as to keep the fun vibe going.
A local festival or fair is great for a first date because there is so much going on.
Music is usually playing and there are a ton of people around, creating a fun and flirtatious atmosphere.
Since you’re walking around, checking out the booths, it opens up the conversation to so many topics such as her favorite type of food, people watching, favorite things to do as a kid and more.
Conversations Shouldn’t Sound Like Job Interviews
Typical first date conversation:
You: “So what do you do for a living?”
Her: “I’m a nurse. How about you?”
You: “I’m a writer… (awkward silence). What kind of music do you like?”
The conversation should be fun, flirty and evoke an emotional response. Don’t ask the same old, interview style questions, instead, get creative by asking open-ended questions like:
“When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?”
“What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done?”
“Call Me Maybe, great song or greatest song?”
Okay so the last one may not apply if you’re over the age of 25, but you get the idea.
The goal of the conversation is to flirt, so the key is to keep that vibe while deepening the rapport between you two.
Another great way to spice up the conversation is to use statements. Playfully call her out on something she’s wearing or a certain mannerism. For example, if she’s really easy going you can say “you are totally giving off a west coast vibe here”. Little statements like that will spark her attention and create a fun back-and-forth banter.
Don’t be afraid to get physical during a first date.
You don’t want to act like a horny teenager and grope her. But touching the small of her back, guiding her with your arm and all the small little details are a must to create sexual tension and keep the flirtatious vibe afloat.
Once the two of you have a playful back-and-forth going, feel free to add in a little horse play. Pick her up over your shoulder and spin her around or playfully poke her. By staying physical, you’ll be able to steer clear of the dreaded friend zone.
First Date Tips for Men – When to Go for the Kiss
The biggest mistake men make is going for the kiss too late.
This isn’t an 80′s romance movie so stop waiting for the door to go in for the kiss.
Make your move half-way through the date or even a little earlier. This way you can establish yourself as a confident, sexual creature that isn’t afraid to pull the trigger.
By going for the kiss early on in the date, you avoid that awkward interaction at the end and increase your chances of getting her into bed instead of a door slammed shut in your face.
Follow these First Date ideas and tips for men and you will never have a boring date again.
Chase Parker is an avid traveler, educator and writer on a variety of subjects. Watch his videos here…
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